i miss you

know what?

i miss my tears~

seriously~

"a hysterical shout...

a vent for my desperate emotions...

a reliable shoulder..."

i think that's what i need for the time being...

or maybe something that able to set me free from "interuption"~

不是别人

在这个只有自己懂自己的世界里，

我害怕尔虞我诈；

我看惯猫哭耗子；

我厌倦美丽就是实力；

我厌恶落井下石；

我憎恨两面人性；

我讨厌互相猜疑。

原来，

转了十九圈，

知心人就是，

.......自己。

我后悔了吗？发现自己越来越冷酷。

我难过了吗？原来你我都不瞭。

我变了。但改变也让人觉得我更残酷了。

因为你看到的是，一只只会窝在别人脚下的小猫蜕变成一只想要吃人的老虎。

而我，并不想成为老虎，只想做个大家都开心的中间人。

原来，一切只有我在希望。

自然而然的，这个希望，随着我的眼泪消灭了。

我后悔了。因为我在意。

我难过了，因为我知道你们不懂。

只怪我太高攀自己的能力了。

oh~ my memories

ok~

i'm just back from camp...

woo~

is just that nice and tired...

some participants even slept for 20 hours!

i can't!!

because have to sit for exam today...

-.-

the camp was amazing...

hehe~

the most unique about this camp is the ECs...

3 EC per day...

great~ for the participants...

especially the "chui mian"-noob-counting game...LOL

and first time saw participants don't want to get back to sleep even we asked to...

haha~

hmm~

i didn't get my cheeks wet because no one say tough tough words...=)

the games were great...

obstacles kinda challenging...

the sad thing is i didn't manage to involve in treasure hunt and station games..='(

know miri people from this camp...

although not close with them and they also don't know who am i...

haha~

still felt glad to know them..=)

many many funny things from this camp...

like who and who, or what and what....

is all the fantastic parts of this camp...

i want those photos..=p

(where's tq dinner's?-.-)

sometimes it just so sweet

i just can't stop my desire to get closer to it...

it's just like a magic-spell...

of course~

it's a nice and wonderful one...=D

wish the camp can start and end perfectly...

i'm looking forward for the amazing's games~

just hope i won't have my cheeks wet on the last day...=p

anyway...

next week is the week i have to vomit all-the-stuff-i-swollen-ed out...

woo~

"massage your fingers before you start the paper~"

tiredly.insanely

lately...

it seem likes everything drove me crazy-ly..

i know it doesn't show apparently...

but deep in my heart...

i felt so damn disappointed,unhappy,sad, miserable,missing and confusing...

no one knows,no one cares~

everything and everyone seems so far and strange for me...

i miss my past times...

i realized that nothing can back to the most precious moment...

because it was just a forgettable past...

even though i treasured it hardly...

but does anyone bother about it?

the relationship and the bonding are no longer exist...

maybe it still bonded...loosely~

sometimes i felt difficulty to walk forward....

even it's a pathway which i most confident in ...

there's no more persistent in my mind...

so don't be surprise when i change my mind...

.just.nice

everyone think that i'm emo and unhappy?

because of my previous posts and showed emo face?

hmm~

honestly...

i'm just in a nice mood...

something like holiday mood..

in fact, i'm having exam soon~ >.<

but still...

in my heart...

really no emo and sadness...

just miss whatever-i-miss... (camp,shopping,gathering,movies,dramas and of course tq dinner)

torturing

now, my life's torturing me...seriously~ tiring life~

everyone is going for camp..

but i have to quarantine myself for weeks...

exam is just around....

>.<>

now i have 5 personal "alarm clock"...

reminding me everyday for revision...sobsob~

anyway,thanks for the caring...=)

appreciate it..

i miss my camp's life...

i'm craving for camp's life...

i want camp...='(

forced to proceed

can you see me?-.-

sob~

191110 is over...i miss you soooooo much...

i want to have it one more time...

='(

initially...

i miss it because it was fun and enjoyable...

until...

i heard sy said her reason she miss the dinner...

i got a deeper sad feeling...=x

honestly...

just get used to mix with this batch...

they're cute, humor,naughty...

and also those noob-noob members...

let me feel so warm...(sometimes~)

now i have to force myself to walk forward...

exam is around....two more weeks~ gosh

fast fast finish...please~

because of you...

i can't join this year end state camp...sob-to-the-max

maybe i will curi-curi go up half day...=p

191110

super-duper nice day for me...

luckily the night didn't disappoint me...

i'm glad that i have the opportunity to join this activity from the very beginning to a beautiful end...

hope everyone enjoyed the night...LOL

in the dinner...

i was just like a kid craving for photo taking...

and i made it...=D

i knew i'm totally crazy last night...i mean it~

i just soooo enjoy and really like what our-pro-MC said... comfortable~

for me...

everyone including the performers,committees, leaders, teachers and ex-leaders done a nice job for the dinner...

gave all of us a great and wonderful night...especially pn.rohayah~

i'm sure i will miss the night...

everyone's singings, dancings, fashion shows...

i miss the times we trained toughly...

and we ended amazingly...=)

a big clap to all of us...wheee~

world change.kids change.

rc again?aikz~

two days' marching course really gave us a huge disappointment....

what can i say?

speechless~

we really need to have some changes...

damn it~

why we're so concern about khsrc?

because it's khsrc...

no khsrc, i think now i'm still a nerd(noob than now)...

no khsrc, i think i have no one to talk heart...

no khsrc, i think i have no so many reliable friends...

no khsrc, i think i have no laughs,no smiles,no toughs,and no gains....

of course, khsrc is not my all...

but for now, i think it's part of my life..as long as i have the ability to help~

excited.nervous.

done one of my practical exam this morning...

it was like what we expected...

however, i knew i won't score full marks for that paper...LOL

now...

i can relieved bit of my stressed-mood...

start concerning about thank you dinner's stuff...

encountered quite-complicated-yet-long journey for that until now...

one more week from now!! 0.0

can't imagine~

and the mean time...

consuming all those "a-bit-complex"-chemical -reactions and those bla-bla-chemical-compounds is also one of my missions...

wt............-.-

initially, don't know when i involved in this activity...have no idea at all~

then, don't know when and why i in-charge for this activity...no idea too~

next, started to get into the situation...

came across quite numbers of annoying and unhappy problems....

but still can be solved...phew~

then now, i'm glad that i can get closer to all of you...

be together to make this dinner a success...

pray pray~

of course...

nothing goes smoothly...

there's still some obstacles for us to confront...

hope everything can be done well...

accomplish all the performances and achieve the theme...

"LEND A HAND, GIVE THANKS"

ohya~

HP7 is coming to town..

can't wait for it~

wheeee~=D

desperately

saw someone's blog...

about the day trip to Genting...

made me feel so sad...='(

i want to be there...

unfortunately...

i made a deal with my mum that we not going for vacation this year...

i miss you, GENTING HIGHLANDS...T_T

in sudden...

i have a evil thinking in my mind...

i never envy about what they have...

but for that particular moment...

how i wish i'm just like who they are...

instead of being who i am now...

i'm loving it~

i just fall in love with these series when i started to watch...

after i step in my current studies...

i even more addicted with them...=)

what i can say is.......

i'm so damn addicted with csi now...

don't ask me why...i can't figure it out too...~.~

start craving for csi lv too...thumps up~

three of them are just so damn freaking nice...=p

for now...

i can't even tell you which one is my favorite...

because all of them are my favorite...LOL

i'm still blur with lv version's casts..

i'm just started to watch this for the new current season...

my first thought for this version is like:"neh~~ so bored storyline, dark background"

but now...

it's not bored anymore... all the cases are so amazing..=p

of course~

never forget about miami and new york...(waiting SOMEONE to give me)

attracting storyline, charming ladies, cool guys...

and the most impressive-- the high technology equipments...

time to start my engine.

time to start revision?

ya~

maybe it seem like STILL HAVE one month to study...

or~

maybe it seem like LEFT one month to study...

which one should i consider?

i think the second-one's...

at least it motivates and reminds me about the torturing examS...='(

"hey~it's time to empty your stupid-brain and consume in those professional-complicated-fates..."

sounds so miserable~

亦简单。亦不简单。

曾经何时。

我很羡慕她能有这么样的待遇。

她却告诉我她一点都不喜欢。

她宁愿不要。

不久前的我。

也经历了这么一回的待遇。

原来真的不好受。

我终于懂她的心痛了。

其实人在不一样的角度。

都会有不一样的想法。

会常常认为自己的生活是最不幸福的。

会认为别人的生活最好。

人嘛。

样样都想要。

唯独失败。

其实我们都不懂。

人可以简单。

幸福就简单了。

只是世俗把人们变得不简单了。

变得这么不堪一击。

october

October, a busy month for me.

and also a moody month for me.

lately.

i'm just......

so damn moody.

so damn desperate.

so damn tired.

for no reason~

time to relax--NOPE

yeah~

last paper for mid-term test ended today...

it seems like it's time for me to relax, enjoy my tons of drama...

weeeee~

but~

one more month...

time to prison again...='(

it's final test!!

gg~

wa die liao...

不是懦者的懦者

也许在外人面前，

掉下眼泪。

也许在委屈下，

掉下眼泪。

也许在压力下，

掉下眼泪。

这些只是一时冲动的眼泪。

也许在有感而发时，

掉下眼泪。

也许看回以前的回忆，

想想我们一起成长的过程，

让自己多么想再回到过去，

再让自己抓住以前的日子，

哪刹那，

泪眶湿了。

nothing at all

lately...

i'm just like a pig...

get so easy to feel sleepy and tired...

*why*

i don't know....

mami said:"you giving yourself too much pressure"...

am i?hmm~

it seem like is a holiday week for us..

but it's not...

it's just like study week...

because have to sit for two tough exam next week...

*gg*

just freaking out...='(

.forever.

appreciate them...=D

一但迷上，就会陷入其中，很执着，很疯狂；

要放弃，应该只有等到得到答案或结局，还是

他们自己先放弃。

只有这样，事情才能挂上完美的句号。

我想这就是双子座的天性吧。

改变？

昨天在一小看到了这么几句话。

“一个人快乐，不是他得到的多，而是他计较得少”。

忽然发现。

最近的我好像改变了一些。（是好是坏当让由你们定夺）

自己觉得变得比较有笑容。

比较敢于发言。

心情也比较放得开。

还有还有。。。。。。。。。。。。。

我想是好事吧？哈哈。

恩人

当你和不认识的他/她第一次见面的时候。

是怎样的。

开始时你们会认为彼此都只是生命的路过者。

认为朋友之间没有永恒。

正所谓：“天下无不散之席”。

所以对彼此都有些防备。

甚至有些只是点头之交。

多年后。

当你转过身。

发现身边有个老面孔。

你就会晓得那个不再是你的路过者。

此时的路过者。

已经是你生活无可缺得的一部分。

他/她会是你的恩人。

一个彩绘你人生的恩人。

他/她永远都猜透你的心事。

因为相处久了。

他/她永远都会第一个知道你秘密的人。

因为信任了。

他/她永远是懂得你喜怒哀乐的人。

因为了解。

你有恩于他/她，

不是因为他/她救了你一命。

不是因为他/她帮了你大忙。

只不过是他/她在你的大部分记忆中。

占有了最珍贵的部分。

看看你们身边有多少这样的他/她？

命运

常说：“命运掌握在我们手中”。

此说并非对也并非错。

对在于，事情的去向往往是我们自己做决定的。

事情的发展也许我们不能控制。

但我们至少对得起自己。

因为是自己决定的。

错在于，我们常盼得到的发展都不如我们所愿。

往往事情的利于弊让我们不知所措。

命运这时候就在掌握我们了。

逼我们做我们不想做的决定。

其实，只是我们爱钻牛角尖。

不想面对更美好的事实，而去放弃自己更向往的自由。

waiting for you~

*craving for this*

who wanna join?

re-activated.

it been ages for me to re-activate my blog...

wo0~

seven months! *i'm lazy to upload new post*

hmm~

so now what made feel like to re-open my blog?

it's because someone special to me...=p

her post inspired me to re-activate my blog..

*glad to hear this??* =p

i'm wondering who will be the first one to DISCOVER my new post...o.0

well~

i'm having my first paper for mid-term test--microbial world...3 more to go.=(

the test is still ok for me...LOL except for the swan-neck.-.-.

next comes the biochem...gonna cry for that...aikx

lately...

my saturday(S) are FULLY OCCUPIED...for what?

for thank you dinner...

i know it's quite tiring but i appreciate it....

it's glad to see all the members to be together..

as like the theme said:"lend a hand, give a thank"

pmr is gonna end very sooooooon~

f3 gonna come back for their workSSSS...

i know that's torturing them...

whatever~

i'm here to welcome all of you back...=p

LOL

I'M BACK! =D

youdixihouyoudiyeh...

donleixiongzoudexihou...

youtaiyanyuanwuyuanyibehleinigohgeiwui...

donleimoigeiwui...

leiwuilam..

ngoyouzigeikoizancoileigegeiwui...

yugoukueidaisuodouwusuoleiyatha...

leigoktakzouloihaibeiyandonzigeihaixiaocaoyouyatmakyehyixi...

ngomengeh...

haileigohsehwui...

hoidouyeh...

wuhaileixiongzoujiuyidenghaoyizoudehao...

yougeiwuijiaoyatdingyaotakzou...

kueitayanwubeileigeiwui...

ngomenggeiwuihaihoyijigeizhancoi...

wahzehleizoudoula...

danhaikuaitayanhochihaitaixiaowah...

"oo...leikongyunla"...

zhunshengwugeitakngozou...

"eh...dimgaikueideimmtongngogaijokkongkeh?"

zhihaozigeizhenzhendeihaikohdoulam...

ngozhidaongowuleng....

ngozhiidaongowuwuikongtimyuanmatyu...

ngozhidaongoyousaikoh...

ngozhidaongowuzektatleidaikoizhuyu...

a new week for me...
degree just started this monday...
however...
it seem like is not a lucky week for me...
pissed off with many unhappy things...
tired~ terrible-ly...='(

what should i say? cheers~ =)
hmm...

chinese new year is around...

no new year feel eh...hmm~

just feel like gambling...

poker.mahjong. =)

win money ya...teehee~~

a new year.a new starting. right?

hope this year will be a great and fabulous year for me...><

back to new house.

get my scholarship.

do well in my degree.

stay healthy and happy. also for my family and friends~

have a shoulder and hand. =p

may all the wishes come true.

.early greeting.

.新年快乐.

最近我有不开心吗?

怎么每个人都说我看起来很难过?

我以为自己表现得很开心了...

很乱~

有谁可以告诉我...

要怎样在家人,朋友,"事业"找到平衡点?

这三个对我来说真的都很重要...

无能为力~

心累了~

哭干了~

500th post...

no special feeling to post anything here...

today's 22th january 2010...

meaningful day?yea for me~

why?today means the end for my foundation year..yeapi~

have my result today...all past~

some are in out of my expectation...

but still in the qualification to apply scholarship...hope so~

my scholarship~iphone~vaio~

youxiwangle...lolz =D

my "very new" target...

thanks for da jie...=p

美丽高解像(the beauty of the game)

story about artists...

at first i not that interested in watching this drama when i saw the drama's name..

but but this drama do seriously attract me after i watched the first episode...

recommended~ thumbs up!!

but i haven't finish yet...

i just that lyk-ki and addict with tvb dramaSSS...

different and interesting storyline..

yet meaningful...

and and...

the drama's theme song attracted me too...=D

ohya...

lots CSI waiting me to follow up...

lolz...

once again thanks to da jie...=p

two more days...

my foundation exam

result...

shall i wait infront my laptop?

curious~kinteo~

hope it's a satisfy result...

my scholarship,my iphone, my vaio laptop are

all depend on the result...

wow...

pray hardly~><

may all the wishes come true...

only the second day of holiday...

im caught into sickness...><

stomachache.knee ache.

but still...

L.O.V.E.s

love life.

love family.

love friends.

love sports.

love shops.

love dramas.

love vacations.

love you.

love me.

才发现...

越有可能发生的事...

越不会发生...

不会如我们所愿...

越有不可能的事...

往往出乎意料...

就奇迹般发生了...

.HOLIDAYS.

sibehlazy.behzaiwantpostwhat.

one more day to holidays...yeapi~

plans for holidays:

-shopping

-stay at shop

-badminton hours

-movie hours

-play!!!

i think there should be lots of rc activities too...

busy?0.0

lolz...

i turn my face away.

just because i don't want to see anything that make me hurt.

i keep my mouth zip.

just because i wondering why i so stupid and idiot.

i show my emo face.

just because i don't know what should i do.

i lost my hopes.

and now.

i searching for a new hope.

will it appear in a short time?

meiyourendecuo.

zhishiwotideqifangbuxia.

shuohaoyaofangqi.

shuohaobuzaihu.

zijiquehennanguo.

shizijitaichongming.

taihuicaile.

erqiehaicaizhongle.

ranhouzijiyounangoule.

zhenkebei.

=(

this few days...

in my heart...

i feel so desperate and emo...

like this....

of course...

on my face...

you saw...

this...

i tried very best not to act emo...

as what i promised...=D

but still...

i keep in my deep here...

and now...

how it look like...

maybe it's too "sour"...

closemyeyes.myears.orescape?

presentations done! teehee~

but........

exam coming...wuuuuu~

then........

holidays...yeapi~

(everyone just started for school...and im just having my holidays...swt)

im sorry...

i lied....

at first...

i thought i can put down...

but NO...

the feel never leave me...

it's still inside here...

anyway....

i not going to be emo...

but still smiling everyday...

i promised...

chi chu le ba?=(